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SPN Quotefic: Dirty Fighting

Title: Dirty Fighting
Genre: gen, sometime in season 5
Wordcount: 970
Rating: PG-13
sandymg who made me very happy when she ‘got’ this one
Disclaimer: Just having some fun…
Summary: Two guys walk into a bar...
Prompt: from
rowley: This has been a horrible train wreck, so we’re done. Team up over. (11.10 The Devil in the Details)

Dirty Fighting

Donald rolled the six-sided coin between his fingers as he distractedly took another swallow of his beer.

“Put it under your pillow tonight and your deepest wish will come true,” the woman had said. Donald still didn’t know why he’d walked into the second-hand store, it wasn’t the kind of place he ever bothered with. He’d barely braved the claustrophobic jumble of stuff inside the door and was going to turn around and leave, when the proprietor, a sharp-cheeked older woman, had stopped him.

“I have exactly what you need,” she’d said, and insisted he come to the back counter where she’d removed the oversize coin from a wooden box. It had been weirdly warm when she pressed it into his hand.

He'd protested, he was not going to buy anything. "It's a gift," she'd cut him short. "Your deepest wish, your secret desire. Put it under your pillow. Tonight."

So he was sitting in a bar trying to figure out what exactly his secret wish was. Money? Well, he wouldn't mind a million dollars or two...Love? Well, he couldn't think of anyone in particular, though someone who looked like Scarlet Johannsen would be nice...

The heated voices from the other end of the bar broke his reverie.

“...think you are? You think you can just keep telling me what to do?! You can just fuck off!"

“I’m your brother, Sammy, it's my job to keep you on the straight and narrow.”

“You know what, Dean, I can make my own decisions!”

Two rough-looking guys were going at it loud enough to make pretty much everyone in the place look at them.

“Yeah, like you make such good ones on your own!" The shorter one in the leather jacket stepped in close to the taller, long-haired man and pushed him in the chest, causing the tall man to take a step backward. "Having me drive over five hundred miles to this podunk town because you think there's a job for us here...and bupkis!"

"I told you, you didn't have to come, I would have been fine checking it out on my own."

"It always goes so well when you're on your own, little brother." Leather jacket kept backing the other one down the length of the bar. "Dad put me in charge of watching out for you and he ain’t here, so it’s my job!

“Yeah, right, Dad cared about me so much he kicked me out for going to college!”

“You’re always running away, and then who has to come bail you out?"

"I'm not asking you to, Dean! You're always throwing yourself in front of me and thinking you're doing something great but you're not! I don't need you to babysit me!"

The bartender made a vain attempt to quiet them down—“Guys, guys, take it outside,” which was as effective as spitting in a volcano.

"Last time you were on your own you ended up sleeping with that skank Ruby—you gonna tell me that was a 'good decision,' Sammy?"

"Screw you, Dean, you don't know anything about what happened. And you should talk, you sleep with anything that has legs!"

Big brother's hand was a blur as it connected with his brother's jaw, crashing the tall guy right into Donald, showering Donald's beer all over Donald and the table.


"Fuck you, Sammy!" Leather jacket spun away toward the exit.

"Well fuck you, too!" Tall dude yelled as he caught himself on the edge of the bar, then turned to Donald. "I'm sorry, dude. My brother's an ass. Let me help you." He grabbed a fistful of napkins and started swiping at the mess on Donald's shirt.

"Lemme." Donald grabbed the napkins away.

"I'm so sorry. Let me buy you another beer. Here." The guy pulled a twenty from his pocket and dropped it on the table.

"Yeah, just let it go, it's okay."

The guy rubbed his jaw as he apologized again, hesitated a moment, and then walked out.

The bartender came over with a towel and a fresh drink, and Donald figured he'd just smell like a brewery till he got home and showered and hoped he wouldn't get stopped by a cop on the way...

His coin.

It had gotten knocked from his hand when the guy crashed into him—it wasn't on the bar, must have fallen on the floor.

He didn't see it around his stool, so Donald got up and checked the floor all along the counter.


Donald waved the bartender over. “Hey, did you see a coin fall somewhere when that guy banged into me?”


“Where the hell did it go?”

As Donald started to check the floor again, a heavyset man sitting at the nearest table spoke up. “Missing something?”

“Yeah, I had a…an antique coin I got today, I dropped it and now I can’t find it.”

“That guy that spilled your beer? It looked like he picked up something from your table. I didn’t know what it was…”

Son of a bitch.

The only thing he can wish for now is that those two assholes get what they deserve.


( 28 comments — Leave a comment )
Mar. 13th, 2016 04:57 am (UTC)
Still lovin' this one :)
Mar. 13th, 2016 05:18 am (UTC)
Woohoo, you're first commentor! The fact that you totally got the scenario right away was awesome!
Mar. 13th, 2016 05:57 am (UTC)
Ah, the old have a loud obnoxious argument, bump into the mark trick.

And lol at their argument. Well, they do say that the best lies, the best cons, are the ones that stick closest to the truth. :\

Anyway, this was fun! Enjoyed it a lot. :D
Mar. 13th, 2016 06:39 am (UTC)
Why, yes, it is an old trick...wonder how many times they've used it?

Glad you enjoyed!
Mar. 13th, 2016 06:55 am (UTC)
:D Loved it! Those boys... always being so darn tricky...
Mar. 13th, 2016 07:48 pm (UTC)
Something different than brute force for a change :)
Mar. 13th, 2016 04:01 pm (UTC)
Ohhhh I love this! Sam and Dean fake fighting to make a distraction so that they could lift that's suspicious sounding coin that sounds like it's been causing trouble!!

Wonderful! Thank you for sharing :)

Mar. 13th, 2016 07:47 pm (UTC)
Glad you enjoyed!
Mar. 13th, 2016 06:54 pm (UTC)
That was a bit underhanded of our boys! But I daresay Donald would have wished for something as bad for him (or worse!) than Dean's sandwich or a talking teddy bear. ("For tea parties!!!!!")
Mar. 13th, 2016 07:54 pm (UTC)
Yes, I don't think Donald would have liked what his wish would have been altered to...
Mar. 13th, 2016 09:19 pm (UTC)
Got a nice chuckle out of that....... m :)
Mar. 14th, 2016 03:04 am (UTC)
Glad to have made you grin!
Mar. 14th, 2016 02:41 am (UTC)
Ooh, I love where you took this quote prompt! There's something about this scene that just rings so much with the perfectly executed con--Sam and Dean working really well together without skipping a beat. Which is such an interesting experience, because of course the POV character himself doesn't have a sense of this--and the fake-fight Sam and Dean have is totally also laced with real elephants between them, as it were. But something I've always found rather notable about them is that even when Sam and Dean aren't necessarily on good terms with each other, interpersonally, that doesn't tend to affect how well they work together. There's always this pace between them; not something mechanical per se (in the "we'll just be partners, not brothers" sense), but some indelible pulse.

Okay, that was a lot of rambling, but that's the feeling I got from this fic. LOVE. <333333333333 Great work!
Mar. 14th, 2016 03:04 am (UTC)
Your reaction makes me very happy! :D

...the fake-fight Sam and Dean have is totally also laced with real elephants between them...

That is exactly what I was going for...

...even when Sam and Dean aren't necessarily on good terms with each other, interpersonally, that doesn't tend to affect how well they work together...

And yes, I have always loved their near mystical ability to anticipate each other. There was an early episode where they were both arrested and being questioned about a murder and they were impossibly in sync even though they were separated. That was one of the big 'falling in love with the brothers' episodes for me!
Mar. 14th, 2016 10:10 am (UTC)
Love what you did with this one! There's enough truth in the argument that the reader is strung along until the coin goes missing, just as much as their mark is. What a shame Donald will never know he should be grateful to them for stealing that wish...
Mar. 14th, 2016 01:02 pm (UTC)
Thanks for reading! Glad you enjoyed it--it was fun to write!
Mar. 15th, 2016 09:30 am (UTC)
I love this!
Mar. 15th, 2016 12:51 pm (UTC)
Yay! That makes me happy!
Mar. 15th, 2016 04:46 pm (UTC)
Oh, I love this!! :)

Very nicely done, very classic Sam and Dean move there! :)

And Donald will never know it, but they just saved him a world of hurt!

Especially loved how the argument was so true to their actual issues, just like in the show, one of those moments where afterwards, you're like, "Well, it was all an act..." except... WAS it, really? :P

GREAT job!
Mar. 15th, 2016 04:49 pm (UTC)
Oh yay, your reaction makes me so happy!

Especially loved how the argument was so true to their actual issues, just like in the show, one of those moments where afterwards, you're like, "Well, it was all an act..." except... WAS it, really?

That was exactly what I was going for!
Mar. 15th, 2016 07:46 pm (UTC)
oh, absolutely brilliant!!!!
Mar. 15th, 2016 10:40 pm (UTC)
Thank you!
Mar. 16th, 2016 02:08 pm (UTC)
Ah, this is just - neat!
Mar. 16th, 2016 02:23 pm (UTC)
Thank you!
Mar. 18th, 2016 06:35 pm (UTC)
Hahahaha, how cool was this!? Very cool. I wish the boys would do this more on the show - but here in the story it just feels like a 'classic Winchester move'. Very neat! :)

Mar. 18th, 2016 08:16 pm (UTC)
...it just feels like a 'classic Winchester move.'

There is no higher praise you could give me! Thank you!
Mar. 22nd, 2016 05:51 am (UTC)

Really enjoyed this one. Very clever and really well-done! I didn't anticipate the ending, I was too caught up in the fight! :D This makes me want to find out more about the case...

Mar. 22nd, 2016 11:20 am (UTC)
You fell for the fake-out just like Donald! :)

And suffice it to say Donald would not have been happy with the way his wish turned out no matter what it was...
( 28 comments — Leave a comment )